Monday, March 30, 2015

Ian McAll and Tinnitus Remedy


While trying to add some polish to my earlier blogpost about "Tinnitus Miracle", I stumbled-upon Ian McAll's "Tinnitus Remedy".
These guys really need a new schtick, because McAll's speech sounds almost exactly like Thomas Coleman's: long-time sufferer, tried everything, was told he just had to live with it, did his own research and came up with a simple program to cure tinnitus in under a week.

To his credit, I didn't notice McAll claiming any sort of professional credentials, like Coleman did. He's just a regular guy, desperate to be rid of his tinnitus, who came up with a cure by working with his own two hands.

Makes you want to cry, doesn't it?

Okay, so who is Ian McAll?

I have no fucking idea. I'll try to dig something up later.

Next step is to look at his website tinnitusremedy.com, which was easy enough, since Yahoo! was kind enough to display it at the top of my search results as an ad.

TinnitusRemedy.com is registered to Ian McAll, which shocked the shit right out of me, I have to admit. What was not a surprise is that the website is registered in Hong Kong and the server is Cloudflare, the nice people who also work for TinnitusMiracle.com and ExposingJohns.com, so you know it's totally legit.

At the bottom of the webpage are the words "All material Copyright © 2014 TinnitusRemedy.com", but I couldn't find any listing for Tinnitus Remedy on the US Copyright Office website, nor any copyrights owned by Ian McAll. So, if I somehow violate his fictitious copyright, is he going to sue me in a Chinese court? Lots of luck, buddy.

There are two reviews of Tinnitus Remedy on the homepage, accompanied by pictures of the people who supposedly sent them in. Let's have a look, shall we?





A very pretty girl. Did she send her pic, along with a note of thanks?

No, she didn't. Here's the original picture

In case you're wondering, it's a stock photo. You can get it at this link. It's called "Young Housewife in the kitchen".

How about this guy?

http://d1hzm3anddlimf.cloudfront.net/textsi/img8.jpg
A handsome young man. Did he send in his thanks to Ian, along with a pic?

Don't be silly. It's a photo from a Spanish language webpage. Here's the original.
 
So, Ian McAll used fake photos posing as letters of thanks from satisfied customers. Prick.

I like this quote from Ian's site
Nothing makes me happier than receiving these letters everyday from people who have gotten rid of their tinnitus and started living the full, happy lives that they deserve. You owe it to yourself to try my program because there is nothing to lose and everything to gain.
I'll just bet he loves getting these letters. It's so much easier when you write them yourself, you lying piece of shit.

So, for the measly price of $37, what do you get? According to a review I found, you get:
1. Different techniques to help tinnitus sufferers treating the actual root cause of the tinnitus condition on a permanent basis.

2. The medications that should be avoided by tinnitus sufferers. These medications either worsen the condition or lead to other health issues.

3. A list of dietary supplements that are known to be helpful for tinnitus sufferers.

4. Multiple breathing methods for tinnitus sufferers to help the body heal.

5. A variety of tips for accurate diagnosis of tinnitus condition on one’s own.

6. Information on a particular common ingredient used in the households that is capable of worsening the tinnitus sufferer’s conditions.

7. List of easily available vitamin supplements for improving the condition of tinnitus sufferers, and more…
Dietary supplements and vitamins? Sounds just like Thomas Coleman, doesn't it? Even the price is the same! Of course, McAll does it better. Coleman just gives you a book, while McAll gives you three books and a couple of CDs.

I get how people feel trapped when suffering with tinnitus. I feel the same way when the ringing in my right ear gets louder than usual. But, McAll is using outright lies to sell you something that won't do you any real good. Like "Tinnitus Miracle", you can get all sorts of useful tips for managing your tinnitus - for free - by joining the forums at Tinnitus Talk.

Hey! I checked out the FAQ section on McAll's site. Let's have some fun!

McAll's text will be in red and my responses and snappy comebacks will be in black. Here we go:

Frequently Asked Questions (you'll notice that none of these questions include: "do you have any medical training?" or "have you submitted your research for scientific peer review?" or "do you have any evidence of clinical trials?"or "why is your website registered in Hong Kong?")
 
Question: Will this remedy really work for me as well?
 
My Answer: Nope.
 
ANSWER: In order to determine if this will work for you (it won't), just fill out our short questionnaire by Clicking Here (link baleeted!!!). If you are eligible, you will be then be shown a short video related to the remedy. (Thereby wasting even more of your time)

Question: I've tried other Tinnitus cures I've read about on the internet that haven't worked. How is this different?
 
ANSWER: Most cures for Tinnitus online are 100% bogus (just like yours, Ian), and often times going to see a doctor can do little to nothing to improve your condition (aside from knowing that you actually have tinnitus and what sort of problems you might face, such as anxiety or depression, which the doctor could give you recommendations about). As a former sufferer (yeah, right! You and Thomas Coleman) of Tinnitus, I know the pain and confusion you are going through (not to mention the pain you'll feel when you lose the $37 and the confusion when get no relief from this bullshit program). It took me several years of trial and error (you should have collaborated with Thomas Coleman, it would have saved you both some time), but I finally did figure out how to get rid of my Tinnitus for good. I've also helped thousands of other people (like those two phony reviews you posted on your website?) as well, so I'm quite confident this will work for you as well (more like you're confident that you've suckered yet another person out of $37).

If you've already gone to see a doctor, chances are they will prescribe you with some form of toxic chemicals (I hate to repeat myself again, but NO MEDICATIONS ARE PRESCRIBED FOR TINNITUS!) recommended by big pharma that may even worsen your condition. Big pharma is in the business of making money (so are you, dickhead), and "curing" a condition is not as profitable for them as "treating" someone (aside from all those clinical trials going-on, right now). Please keep that in mind.

If you have tried some remedies online, you probably were disappointed by how silly their recommendations were; like holding a lit candle near your ear with the hopes that the heat will help dislodge whatever is "inside" of your ear causing your Tinnitus. This is ridiculous and please do not attempt it. My NATUAL (invest in Spellcheck) 3-step remedy (you send him money, he takes your money, he sends you shit in the mail. Yeah, three steps) has helped thousands of people rid themselves of Tinnitus once and for all within a matter of a few days (notice how he provides no proof that he has actually helped anyone).

Question: How long does it take for the remedy to work?
 
My Answer: forever.
 
ANSWER: It varies from person to person, however, I would estimate the average time to be around 10 days once you start the process.

Question: Once your system rids me of my Tinnitus, will it return again later on?
 
My Answer: how can it "return" when it won't go away?

ANSWER: In most cases no, however, you need to keep some things in mind. The reason your Tinnitus started in the first place may be due to exposure to loud music, machinery or other sounds. You need to think about this, and determine if you are exposing yourself to loud music/sounds, and if so, take precautions going forward. You need to make sure you wear ear plugs whenever you are exposed to loud noises in the future. If you are mindful of this, most likely your Tinnitus will not return. (the only good advice you've given, so far)


Question: My doctor recommended I get surgery, what should I do?

My Answer: surgery is not a treatment for tinnitus
 
ANSWER: I don't want to contradict what your doctor (yeah, since doing that could set you up to face civil or criminal charges, even in China) tells you, but, I will say this: If it were me, I would never let anyone with a knife go near my ears. In all of my time researching Tinnitus (how long was that?), I have not seen more than a few cases were (should be "where" not "were") surgery has helped. To me, it seems like another scam for hospitals to make money. (you should talk about scamming people, like with those two fake reviews you posted)

Question: Will your remedy also fix some of my other symptoms besides my Tinnitus?
 
My Answer: nope. However, your bank account will feel a bit lighter.
 
ANSWER: Getting rid of your Tinnitus will most certainly help you sleep better at night, relieve some of your anxiety, improve your concentration and improve your general quality of life. It may also improve mild hearing loss, relieve dizziness and relieve pain in your ear as well. (do you have any sort of scientific evidence to back up any of this?)

Question: Do you offer support once I begin the treatment?
 
ANSWER: Yes, I will be available by to assist you every step of the way. I will give you access to my private email address and I'll be here for you every step of the way. (bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha!!!)

This system looks like a virtual clone of "Tinnitus Miracle", as if one of them simply copied their system from the other. I have no idea which of these douchebags got started first or if they copied from yet another scammer.

This entry is just a rough draft. I'll add more later.


Duane Browning
 
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